forgotten Bottom

...strand... takes place on the Schuylkill River, nestled between a city dump and the world of progress.


Future Fancy Ultimate tour

Designed for the urban adventurer, this chic tour features a suave picnic repast avec fermented ichor. Sit back, relax and let us give you the perfect and most memorable day. Enjoy a world class picnic meal and fresh seasonals with first class service. Luxurious trailhead drop-off and VIP parking. Book your tour today and indulge in the beauty and splendor of Forgotten Bottom. 

Medieval Revelry Tour

*PARTIAL CLOSURE: Due to temporal anomalies, portions of this tour have been closed to the public. Adventurers who wish to purchase the Medieval Revelry Tour may do so but will be redirected for portions of their tour: either thru Rugged Primal or Nuclear Romance. Take a merry minstrel-led courtly romp well quaffed.

Nuclear Romance

TEnjoy glowing romance in a neotopic, semi-apocalyptic experience designed for the radiant, yet less rugged folks.. This tour includes limited seating and scooters for transportation.

Rugged Primal

Discover Forgotten Bottom in all its rusted, abandoned glory. Not for the faint at heart, Rugged Primal is the bare-bones, raw, elemental experience. That’s right, no mosquito repellent provided!